Prioritize You: A Guide to Vacationing While Supporting a Loved One with Addiction or Mental Health Struggles
Preparing for a vacation can feel stressful when you're a woman supporting a loved one with mental health or addiction struggles. The idea of leaving them behind may stir up feelings of guilt, anxiety, or even fear about what could happen in your absence. However, it's important to remember that taking time for yourself is essential. A well-deserved break can recharge your energy, restore your mental health, and allow you to continue supporting your loved one more effectively. Here's how you can prepare for a vacation that truly allows you to take care of YOU!
1. Open the Lines of Communication:
Before you leave, have an honest and compassionate conversation with your loved one about your upcoming trip. Let them know why this time away is important for you and reassure them that you're not abandoning them. Share your plans, how long you'll be gone, and any steps you're taking to ensure they're supported while you're away.
2. Create a Support Plan:
To ease both your minds, put a support plan in place. This could involve enlisting the help of other family members, friends, or professional caregivers who can check in regularly. If your loved one has a therapist or counselor, inform them of your plans. If you don’t have permission to speak with their professional, encourage your loved one to arrange extra sessions during your absence.
Tips for creating a support plan:
Emergency Contacts: Provide your loved one with a list of people they can contact in case of an emergency, including yourself.
Daily Check-Ins: Arrange for someone to check in with your loved one daily by phone, text, or in person. Involving your loved one in choosing the person can help ensure they're comfortable with the arrangement.
Resources: Make sure they have access to prescribed medications, support group meetings, or other resources they may need.
3. Prepare for Potential Triggers:
Vacations can be a time when caregivers worry about potential triggers for their loved ones. If there are specific situations that you know might cause stress or anxiety in your absence, address them ahead of time. This could involve leaving detailed instructions for the person stepping in or arranging for extra support.
Examples of potential triggers:
Changes in Routine: If your absence will disrupt your loved one’s daily routine, help them adjust by creating a clear plan or schedule. Working on this together may help your loved one feel part of the process.
Social Situations: If your loved one struggles with social anxiety, suggest low-pressure activities or alternative ways to connect with others.
Boredom: If your loved one struggles with urges or mental health during periods of alone time, discuss ways they can break up long periods of isolation.
Loneliness: Encourage them to engage in social activities or to reach out to a trusted friend or support group.
4. Set Boundaries and Stick to Them:
While it’s natural to want to check in constantly, try to set boundaries that allow you to truly disconnect and recharge. Decide ahead of time how often you’ll check in and stick to that plan. Let your loved one know when they can expect to hear from you, so they don’t feel abandoned or anxious in your absence.
Questions to ask yourself:
How can I ensure this vacation feels like a true experience of self-care for myself?
How can I use this time away to nurture my own mental and emotional health?
What supports do I need to put in place when I return to help me in my support role?
5. Trust the Process and Let Go:
Finally, trust that you’ve done everything you can to ensure your loved one is supported while you're away. Letting go can be difficult but remember that your well-being is just as important as theirs. By taking this time for yourself, you’re investing in your ability to be a more present, patient, and compassionate caregiver when you return.
Preparing for a vacation as a caregiver involves thoughtful planning, open communication, and a commitment to setting boundaries that protect your well-being. By taking these steps, you can enjoy a restorative break, knowing that your loved one is cared for and supported in your absence. Remember, taking care of yourself is not a luxury—it’s a necessity. When you return, you’ll be better equipped to continue providing the care and support your loved one needs.
Need more guidance? I can help. My name is Christi Alicea, and I work with women who have gotten lost in their loved one's mental health or substance use struggles and have put their own self-care on the back burner. If you're struggling with balancing self-care and caregiving responsibilities, consider reaching out for support. I can help you develop strategies for managing both roles effectively, so you can feel better taking that much-needed break.
I’d love to meet with you on my free 30-minute discovery call and talk about how we can create a plan for your self-care that supports a happier you. I look forward to meeting you!